The topic of men making women cry is an important one that the Bible addresses directly. God cares deeply for those who are oppressed or mistreated, including women who are caused to cry by men. Throughout Scripture we see principles and examples that make it clear that causing women to weep is sinful and grieves God’s heart.
Understanding what the Bible teaches on this topic provides guidance for husbands, church leaders, and all Christians in how to properly honor and value women. It also reveals God’s compassion and identification with the hurting, His promises to comfort them, and the hope He extends for healing and reconciliation where relationships have been damaged. Examining biblical teachings in this area equips us to prevent future hurt and restore brokenness when it has occurred.
Old Testament Examples
In the Old Testament, there are several examples of men causing women to weep or cry.
One example is Potiphar’s wife falsely accusing Joseph of attempted rape after he refused her advances, which led to Joseph being imprisoned (Genesis 39:6-20). Another is when Jacob deceived Leah by marrying her instead of her sister Rachel, which caused Leah much grief (Genesis 29:15-25).
When David committed adultery with Bathsheba and she became pregnant, this caused her much distress (2 Samuel 11). Amnon raping his half-sister Tamar also caused her great anguish (2 Samuel 13:1-22).
There are also examples of women crying out to God during times of oppression, such as the Israelites crying out from their slavery in Egypt (Exodus 2:23).
Overall, the Old Testament contains many examples of men’s actions causing women sadness and tears. However, it also shows God hearing their cries and intervening on their behalf.
New Testament Examples
The New Testament contains several examples of men causing women to cry. One poignant story is when Jesus raises a widow’s son from the dead in Luke 7:11-17. Jesus had compassion on the grieving mother and brought her son back to life, stopping her tears.
Another example is found in John 11, when Jesus raises Lazarus from the dead. John 11:33 says “When Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who had come along with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in spirit and troubled.” Here the text indicates that Jesus was moved by the tears of Lazarus’ sisters Mary and Martha.
While these stories show Jesus’ compassion for crying women, there are also examples of when his disciples caused women to weep. In Matthew 15:22-28, a Canaanite woman pleads with Jesus to heal her demon-possessed daughter. At first Jesus ignores her cries, and his disciples urge him to send her away. Although Jesus eventually heals her daughter, his initial dismissal deeply troubled the woman.
The New Testament emphasizes Jesus’ empathy for hurting women. Yet it also contains moments when men like the disciples failed to show sensitivity, causing women to weep. Jesus sets the ultimate example of compassion.
Jesus’ Treatment of Women
Jesus’ interactions with women in the Gospels provide a model for how men should treat women with dignity and respect. Though women occupied a lower social status in 1st century Palestine, Jesus repeatedly affirmed their intrinsic worth and honored their faith.
Jesus healed Peter’s mother-in-law when she was sick with fever (Mark 1:29-31). He had compassion on the widow of Nain and raised her son from the dead (Luke 7:11-15). Jesus also praised Mary’s choice to sit at his feet and learn, rather than help with household tasks like her sister Martha (Luke 10:38-42).
One of Jesus’ most famous encounters was with the Samaritan woman at the well (John 4:1-26). He crossed social boundaries by speaking with her directly and revealing his Messianic identity to her. The woman immediately went and told people about Jesus.
Jesus “healed these women, who already stood out in society, and they, in turn, showed their gratefulness by financially supporting His ministry.” Jesus saw the intrinsic value in women and treated them with dignity.
Biblical Principles
The Bible provides many principles for how men should treat women with care and respect. Two key passages are Ephesians 5:25 and 1 Peter 3:7.
Ephesians 5:25 says “Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” This teaches that a husband should be willing to sacrifice himself for his wife’s wellbeing, just as Christ sacrificed himself for the church. He should love and cherish her.
1 Peter 3:7 instructs “Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.” This means men should be considerate, caring, and respectful towards their wives. They should honor women both physically and spiritually.
Overall, the Bible condemns violence, cruelty, and mistreatment of women. It upholds ideals of love, sacrifice, understanding, and cherishing one’s wife. Men are called to be servants and providers for the women in their lives. The example of Jesus shows tenderness, compassion, and esteem for women.
Husbands and Wives
The Bible has much to say about how a husband should treat his wife. Husbands are called to love their wives sacrificially, as Christ loved the church (Ephesians 5:25). This means loving her unconditionally, putting her needs above his own, and caring for her as he would his own body. Mistreating or abusing a wife is strongly condemned in Scripture.
Proverbs 12:4 says, “An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, but she who brings shame is like rottenness in his bones.” Husbands should cherish and honor their wives. Making a wife cry through hurtful words or actions could be considered bringing shame or rottenness.
According to 1 Peter 3:7, husbands should treat their wives with respect and as co-heirs in Christ so that their prayers will not be hindered. The Bible warns that unkindness to a wife will have spiritual consequences.
There are several verses that speak of God hearing and responding to the cries of the hurting. Psalm 56:8 says God keeps track of our wanderings and puts our tears in His bottle. He cares deeply when anyone is caused to weep. Proverbs 15:3 says, “The eyes of the LORD are in every place, keeping watch on the evil and the good.” God sees all things, including the tears of women.
While the Bible does not contain a specific verse about God counting a woman’s tears when she cries, the passage in 1 Peter 3:7 implies there are consequences for husbands who treat their wives in ways that cause them to weep. Husbands must be cautious to honor their wives as co-heirs and treat them with understanding and respect.
Church Leaders
Church leaders are held to high standards when it comes to their treatment of women. The Bible instructs leaders to be above reproach and treat all people with love and respect.
1 Timothy 3 sets out qualifications for overseers and deacons, stating they must be ” respectable, hospitable, able to teach, not violent but gentle, not quarrelsome, not a lover of money”. These qualities apply to all people, including women.
In addition, leaders are called to imitate Christ, who treated women with dignity and respect, even in a cultural context where women were often marginalized. Jesus’ interactions with women like the Samaritan woman at the well (John 4) and the woman caught in adultery (John 8) demonstrate compassion and kindness.
While some interpret 1 Timothy 2 to limit women’s leadership roles, others believe this passage addressed specific issues in Ephesus and did not universally prohibit women from teaching or having authority. Regardless, church leaders should follow Jesus’ example of uplifting and empowering women.
Modern Application
The Bible provides timeless principles for how men should treat women that are just as applicable today as they were thousands of years ago. While cultures and social norms change over time, God’s truth remains constant (Hebrews 13:8). As Christian men, we are called to apply biblical principles to our relationships with women even when those principles go against what society says is acceptable (Romans 12:2).
For example, society today often promotes casual relationships and hookup culture. However, the Bible is clear that intimate relationships should occur only within the covenant of marriage (1 Corinthians 7:2). As Christian men, we must reject secular attitudes about sexuality and treat women with the honor, value, and care that God intends. This means avoiding any form of emotional, verbal, physical, or sexual abuse that would cause a woman harm.
Additionally, while society promotes individualism and self-interest, the Bible calls men to sacrificial leadership in our homes and churches (Ephesians 5:25-30). This requires humbly serving our wives and fellow sisters in Christ, not demanding submission or obedience. We are to empower women to utilize their gifts, not stifle them.
As Christian men, we must ensure that biblical principles shape how we view and treat women in dating, marriage, church leadership, and all of life. This brings honor to Christ, benefits our relationships, and displays God’s love to the world.
Prevention and Reconciliation
The Bible emphasizes the importance of reconciliation and restoring relationships after conflict or hurt. Though sometimes difficult, taking steps to reconcile is vital for our spiritual health and witness.
To prevent hurting others, we must grow in love, patience, self-control, and kindness (Galatians 5:22-23). Husbands in particular are called to honor their wives and treat them with understanding (1 Peter 3:7). Church leaders must lead by example in gentleness and care for others (1 Timothy 3:3). We all can benefit from examining our hearts and asking God to change any harmful attitudes or behaviors (Psalm 139:23-24).
If we have hurt or offended someone, Jesus commands us to be reconciled before offering worship to God (Matthew 5:23-24). With humility and courage, we should confess our wrongdoing and seek the forgiveness of those we’ve hurt, even if reconciliation isn’t possible (James 5:16). Our repentance may open the door to rebuilding trust and rapport. However, the other person may not be ready or willing to reconcile, and we must respect that. Either way, we can have peace knowing we obeyed God by sincerely pursuing reconciliation.
Conclusion
In conclusion, the Bible gives clear principles that men should follow to avoid making women cry through unkind words or actions. Though there are examples of men in Scripture causing women to weep, often these stories serve as cautions against such behavior. Jesus set the example by treating women with dignity, respect and compassion.
The Bible instructs husbands to love their wives sacrificially, as Christ loved the church. Marriage relationships should be characterized by mutual love, patience, kindness and forgiveness. While church leaders are called to gently guide their congregations, they should be wary of heavy-handed authority that could cause distress.
Overall, the Bible promotes healthy relationships between men and women. Open communication, empathy and thoughtfulness can prevent hurt feelings and tears. When conflict does occur, men should seek reconciliation through repentance, changed behavior and restoration of trust. With God’s strength, we can build a society where all people are valued, and no one needs to cry from ill treatment.
